once i was sick so i got a prescription for codeine cough syrup and when i went to pick it up the pharmacist was like “you really won’t need all of this” and i was like “it’s ok i could just sell it at school” and he was like “YEAAAAAAAH FUTURE PHARMACIST” and fist bumped me
ok apparently this pharmacist is my brother’s old pot dealer
his name is scooter
(Source: grass10, via justinio)
#Wall decals about bible verses will class up any kitchen #You should come to my Thirty-One party
I can’t stop. There are too many:
#I’m the best mom on this field trip and everyone knows it #Have you read Eat, Pray, Love? #Let’s get lattes after Zumba! #Gluten causes Autism #I will have him pulled out of your class #Oh shoot, I forgot I volunteered to bring brownies to faith group tonight #We don’t let him watch more than one hour of TV a day #Stick figure family window sticker #(whispers behind hand) you’ve got to read 50 Shades of Grey
Forgive me. I am a mother, and I walk among these women every day. I have adopted their ways as a form of camouflage.
(Source: tibets, via sadghostmermaid)
"If it senses sadness with its fluffy fur, a Blissey will rush over to the sad person, however far away, to share an egg of happiness that brings a smile to any face."
- Blissey’s Emerald Pokédex Entry
okay this might be the stupidest comic i’ve ever drawn.
merged version here
(Source: scarfowl, via typicalthai)
I’m curious if people think I look good naked